Only one person can fill my shoes...

So, I've come to the realization that I cannot do everything. Shock! I am completely overwhelmed and in over my head right now. Yes, it's probably the busiest time of the year for us...yes I have a problem saying no...yes I always take on more than I can chew.

Why do I think I am the only one that can do something? So this week, I have been working early/thru lunch/late everyday. I've also been trying to keep up with all of the house work because I know this weekend is going to be crazy and I don't like to spend my weekends cleaning...that's my time with my girls because lately it seems like all I do it work! Fall festival for girl scouts is tonight (yes, I signed up to run a booth and I am now just painting signs in between answering emails)-no clue yet how I am going to fit in getting off work in time, dinner and getting Kyleigh to scouts by 6. This has been a miserable fail the past 3 weeks!

Oh, and Kyleigh's birthday is this Saturday. I have to buy paper products and bake a cake...actually, 2 cakes and about 24 cupcakes and I haven't bought the stuff yet. And I need to get stuff together for the pumpkin decorating. And I want my weekend free because we have one of my nephews staying with us all weekend. And I have 3 high priority projects that have to be done in the next week at work.

Stressed yet? I am!

So, my wonderful husband seeing my stress level on his lunch break today offers to pick up the groceries I need for the cake tonight. All I have to do is leave him a list. Is he capable? Yes. Does he mind? No.

So here I am blogging about my inability to let things go instead of writing his shopping list. AH! Something has got to give. I need to give up my superwoman cape or my job or just the simple thought that I can be everything to everyone and give 110% to every little thing in my life.

Anyone else in my sinking boat???

What's that thing on the fridge???

Yup. We now have a new and improved version of my previous chore charts on our fridge! This is Day 1. Here is how my program works....

Kyleigh and Reece each have their own chart with tasks that I think are age appropriate for them to accomplish. I included some chores (getting all school materials together) as well as behavioral items (no talking back), but it's mostly stuff they should be doing everyday anyway (putting things away, brushing teeth, etc.). There are 16 lines of activities or behaviors on each and they are expected to accomplish at least 12 or they don't get TV or computer time the next day. I put stars beside two behaviors that will automatically result in loss of electronics which are "Losing your temper" to include any yelling or fighting between the two and "Talking Back", which I pretty much have no tolerance for.

We were completely up front with them and they both looked over these and agreed with them and liked them (we'll see how that goes once they have a bad day!!) Other than Kyleigh looking at me like I was completely crazy for threatening to take her computer away if she didn't her 12 stickers a day, I think it went well and they both understand clearly what it expected of them. Along with their daily activities, we also added just one special "helper" chore a week. I put several slips of paper listing out activities around the house and the girls will randomly pick one a week to be there responsibility.

This week, Kyleigh is the bathroom cleaner (helps me clean the bathrooms on Fridays) and Reece is the Dishwasher helper (dries the dishes and I put them up, rinses them off for me to load the dishwasher). I sat down and explained what each of them meant in detail so they couldn't claim later they didn't know what to do :-)

What do you get for all of this hard work helping out around the house and being good you ask?

Money, but our allowance is a little different. If the girls get at least 12 stickers everyday that week, they will each earn $2 a week for themselves to do whatever they want with. They also will earn an additional $2 each "giving" money where they will get to decide if they want to donate to a cause, buy someone a gift, etc. They can only use this money for others. There is no telling what they will pick to do with it, but I think that is the fun part.

We hope we are opening the door for a lot of things with this....hoping they will learn to help out more, have good behavior, earn money, save money and also be giving to others. They were both very excited to start this morning and already very competitive! Imagine that!

Just walking by...

Just walking by my stairs after I had told Reece "We have company coming. Please go put your cars back upstairs.

This is what her response to that was:

"What mom? You told me to put them UP the stairs?"

It was a long morning of trying to clean up! I have to admit, I was tired of nagging her and gave up and just did it myself. I have to be better about this. I am implementing the chore charts again this week and putting my foot down!

Motivating a 3 year old

Ah my precious Reece a roni. Full of life, energy and more spunk than any of us can handle. I have tried quite unsuccessfully to create a sort of harmony in our house. If you take out a toy (or buckets full of toys in our case) you put them back. You want something, you say please. You get something, you say thank you. You take turns with your sister. You are nice to the pets. These things are non-negotiable in my house.

So, Reece has her own viewpoint on how this should all happen. Mommy picks up all of my toys, I do not use my polite words unless I am prompted (this is by the way is of course after I have obtained a chair or some other object to get it myself to avoid this whole issue) and anything that is Kyleigh's, is mine whenever I want it.

I know she's 3 and she's still just learning all of this, but I really want to make a united front. With Kyleigh when she wouldn't pick up after herself, we would take anything that wasn't put in it's place at the end of the day in a bag and she would lose it. She learned very quickly that if she got toys she needed to take care of them.

We have tried this several times with Reece. She actually helps us put the toys in bags and waves them goodbye. No tears, nothing. Even her beloved matchbox cars have been taken away.

The politeness is getting better and I know that is an age thing. Toddlers naturally have a very strong self view and it takes them a while to get the hang of manners. That one I know will come with time...and Kyleigh's help. It's actually sweet. When Reece will ask for something, Kyleigh will say "mommy, can I show Reece the right way to ask for it" or "Reece, you know you are forgetting something".

So I am reaching out for ideas. I have refused to clean up her room now for 3 weeks, I just take my foot and shove the toys out of the way to make room for us to get to her bed (yes folks, I am not exaggerating that one!). What can I do to get her to help me out? We have trying making it into a game (basketball into the toy buckets), having a race to see who can put it up the fastest (which turns into her expecting a treat every night when she picks up even one toy), we have tried taking the toys away she won't pick up, we have taken away movies, I have not let her come out until the toys have been picked up (the longest she has stayed in her room was almost 2 1/2 hours!) and I have just ignored it thinking she would get tired of it herself (clearly not working at this point!).

She is such a wonderful kid and has just the best personality. She is so sweet and daring and ready for anything at the drop of a hat. I love her spontaneity and her zest for life, even at 3....I just don't want to do anymore acrobatic moves that I am not physically prepared for because I have stepped on a car and am heading face first for the floor!!!!

Imagination Games

So, along with all of the great gifts Kyleigh got for her birthday, her Grandma gave her a book called "The Daring Book for Girls". It's filled with fun stuff that every girl needs to know, back when it was OK to play out in the neighborhood and everyone wasn't completely addicted to video games. Personally, my house is a no video game zone, we don't own any, but I'm not one of those moms that is obsessive about it. I just think my girls can figure out better ways to have fun, play and spend their time than in front of a TV all day. Oh trust me, they get their TV fix, but it is cut off at a certain time, or it's just music playing.

I thought I would share some of the fun games my girls have come up with. All of these were played just this afternoon together!

Blue Barrel Rodeo - See picture below. You take out all of the stuffed animals from the blue bucket that stores them and have one girl get inside (she powers the barrel). The other sister jumps on top and tries to stay on as the "power" is rolling her back and forth. Hours of fun.



Stacking towers - This also requires toy storage materials. Get those colored bins that hold all of the toys and dump them out on the floor. See who can stack the remaining bins the highest. Of course, the funnest part of this is who can make the most dramatic fall!

Mom and baby - A definite stand in my house. Reece is baby, Kyleigh is mommy. Helps her deal with control issues :-)

Chase - around the coffee table just fast enough to make mom have a heart attack and think she will be going to the emergency room any minute for a cracked skull

Dance off - Self explanatory. Have mom turn the TV to the dance channel. Boogie down.

Concert - Grab the microphone and stand (guitar optional) and just make up the words as you go. Have the 3 year old be a crazed fan.

Of course when all is finished, a game of toy basketball to get everything back in the buckets/bins is in order.

Remember what we played when we were little and too busy for TV? I know I loved the field across from my house right after they had cropped it dry. There were always nice dirt balls perfect for belting my neighbor with ( I was a vicious tomboy!)

How about you?

Safe sex, safer TV

Got your attention didn't I :-)
I am a firm believer in family meals. Dinnertime in my house means everyone sits down, turns the TV off and talks about what went on with their day. It's our time to come together and connect. Last night, Bobby and I connected with Kyleigh in a way we were not ready for and didn't see coming.
Reece was lining up Barbie's after finishing her meal and had Barbie and Ken on top of each other. I quietly pulled them apart, lining them all in a row for Reece. Nothing more was said or done. Then Kyleigh says "Did you pull them apart because you thought they were having sex?". From my 5 year old? I was so shocked at that point, I didn't push it. Tonight we sat down for a good old fashion girl talk.......
My normal afternoon consists of my 1 hour drive home, then cooking dinner, cleaning, baths and then bed. While I am cooking, we often let the girls watch Discovery Kids (mostly to keep them from being all over the kitchen or asking every 2 minutes when dinner is going to be ready!). For the record, I am not a big fan of the TV, I'm a radio girl myself, but at least the shows on this channel are educational. If it is not on this channel, I leave it on ABC Family, also "thinking" this was a "safe" channel to leave it on as I cook or give Reece a bath. I've always felt I was very selective in the TV I let them watch.
Evidently there is a new show on ABC Family these days called "The Secret Life of the American Teenager", where a 15 year old gets pregnant.....hence Kyleigh's new knowledge of the word sex. After a sigh of relief that my baby really didn't know what she was saying and that she had not been harmed, I am reflecting back on the education I just received. For those parents who do not want their children taught life lessons by the bright flashing box, just a reminder to stop and take a look at what is on and do not assume because it is on a family channel or geared towards kids that it is appropriate or in line with the values you what to represent in your family!