Monday, February 23, 2009

Motivating a 3 year old



Ah my precious Reece a roni. Full of life, energy and more spunk than any of us can handle. I have tried quite unsuccessfully to create a sort of harmony in our house. If you take out a toy (or buckets full of toys in our case) you put them back. You want something, you say please. You get something, you say thank you. You take turns with your sister. You are nice to the pets. These things are non-negotiable in my house.

So, Reece has her own viewpoint on how this should all happen. Mommy picks up all of my toys, I do not use my polite words unless I am prompted (this is by the way is of course after I have obtained a chair or some other object to get it myself to avoid this whole issue) and anything that is Kyleigh's, is mine whenever I want it.
I know she's 3 and she's still just learning all of this, but I really want to make a united front. With Kyleigh when she wouldn't pick up after herself, we would take anything that wasn't put in it's place at the end of the day in a bag and she would lose it. She learned very quickly that if she got toys she needed to take care of them.

We have tried this several times with Reece. She actually helps us put the toys in bags and waves them goodbye. No tears, nothing. Even her beloved matchbox cars have been taken away.

The politeness is getting better and I know that is an age thing. Toddlers naturally have a very strong self view and it takes them a while to get the hang of manners. That one I know will come with time...and Kyleigh's help. It's actually sweet. When Reece will ask for something, Kyleigh will say "mommy, can I show Reece the right way to ask for it" or "Reece, you know you are forgetting something".

So I am reaching out for ideas. I have refused to clean up her room now for 3 weeks, I just take my foot and shove the toys out of the way to make room for us to get to her bed (yes folks, I am not exaggerating that one!). What can I do to get her to help me out? We have trying making it into a game (basketball into the toy buckets), having a race to see who can put it up the fastest (which turns into her expecting a treat every night when she picks up even one toy), we have tried taking the toys away she won't pick up, we have taken away movies, I have not let her come out until the toys have been picked up (the longest she has stayed in her room was almost 2 1/2 hours!) and I have just ignored it thinking she would get tired of it herself (clearly not working at this point!).

She is such a wonderful kid and has just the best personality. She is so sweet and daring and ready for anything at the drop of a hat. I love her spontaneity and her zest for life, even at 3....I just don't want to do anymore acrobatic moves that I am not physically prepared for because I have stepped on a car and am heading face first for the floor!!!!

No comments: