Little white lies

Omissions. No, not the ones coming out of your car stinking up the environment, those little omissions you conveniently leave out. Little white lies. Most folks would say a lie is a lie no matter what. But what if it is to protect someone? How about lying to yourself?

I know I have been guilty of both of these.

I found myself being lied to this weekend by my dad. I know it well, the lie to protect by omission. It's the first time I have seen him in two chemo cycles and he was tired. Usually he is tearing the phone up calling to see when he is able to come over to see the girls, but on Saturday the whole day went by and no word from him. Finally at 4:30 I called out of worry and he said he was just giving my mom time with the girls.....a lie to protect. It was almost like he was avoiding it, not that he didn't want to see us and spend time with us, but he knew what I would know when I saw him. I still think it's funny how we have not been close until the last 6 years and I can almost read his mind and know what he is thinking when I see him. I am so thankful for our ability to be "in sync" with each other. But, he did come for a little bit and we got to eat lunch and spend some time together today as well, which was definitely a treat.

And lies to ourselves....this is a major one for me. Lying to myself telling me I can hold it all together, lying to myself telling me I can forget things in the past...that they don't affect me today. These are easy to catch in other people as well, when they do noble and thoughtful things, but for the glory of it for themselves and not for the true meaning behind them. Lying to themselves that they are paving the way to Heaven by doing good deeds, but choosing to create their own glory for themselves on earth instead of earning it in Heaven.

Forgive me for getting religious for those of you that read and are listening to me rant, but I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Lies hurt. No matter the reason, no matter the situation. There is no good reason not to be completely honest with people, and more importantly with yourself. If you are sick and hurting, why not let go of that pride and reach out? Emotionally or physically, we all need to let go of ourselves and our pride and be honest. Are we really protecting the people we love when it is tearing us apart?

This is a "new years resolution" I am not waiting for. It's going to be a slow process, but one I think will be worth it. I hope you will all join me in letting a little more honesty in your life and seeing where it leads you.