Thursday, October 15, 2009

Weather Forecasts

Yesterday...61 degrees...chilly...wet...rainy...gloomy.

Forecast for January 13, 2009....41 degrees...cold...wet....rainy...gloomy

Take me back 10 months to sitting outside in the cold, wet, rainy, gloomy weather. Numb from the cold, numb from watching them pray over my Dad's casket. I'm masking it pretty well at this point. I've had my own private breakdown. I've got on my "it's all going to be ok" face. I'm the strong one right? While everyone else is crying or scemeing, I've got to be the one keeping it together.

Well, I'm still trying to tape my broken heart together. My heart hurt so badly yesterday. I'm sure we have had rainy cold days since January, but for some reason yesterday hit me like a ton of bricks. I miss my dad so much. There is so much going on in my life right now...so much to decide and talk about. I would love to be able to call him and see what he thinks. He was great about giving a no nonsense answer...whether it was what you wanted to hear or not. Everything seems to be in rollercoaster mode right now. Life is moving so fast. I just wanted to stop yesterday and remember him.

1 comment:

Jenny said...

i'm so sorry you lost your father. i know that's something i will have to face one day and it kills me just to think about it. (((hugs)))