When we started this process, we thought for sure we would have our son/daughter home by their first birthday. God has other plans. I was having lunch with a fellow adoption buddy I met through church on Friday and we were talking about our timing versus God's timing. I would have had this happen so many times already, but every time that "date" in my head passes without anything to show for it I am sad yes, but there is always a reason for the wait. Maybe it was a heart change that needed to happen or maybe a connection that needed to be made or something that needed to happen for Asher and his Foster Family. Sometimes I know what these reasons are and sometimes the time passes and I don't have a clue.
While I have swallowed back a couple of tears today (and last night), I'm trying to stay focused that my time lines aren't always right. Seriously, so far my plans have paled in comparison. I am sad we didn't get to share this special time with him. I wish he was home. But I know his foster family has given him a wonderful celebration and I just hope they took bunches of pictures!!!
We did celebrate last night by going out for Korean and it was delish! We had dumplings, galbi (Korean marinated short ribs), bulgogi (marinated *spicy* chicken), bunches of side dishes I had no clue what their names were and bibimbap (which is a vegetable, beef and rice mixture with spicy red soybean mixture). We were worried if the girls would like it, but they loved it! Our nice waitress even brought more of one of the mystery side dishes because Reece literally ate the entire thing :-)
I really tried not to cry, but I have to admit I got teary eyed on the way home. Of course what comes on the radio but that darn "While I'm waiting" song to just make matters even worse! We got a birthday cake for Asher and sang him Happy Birthday and the girls' blew out his candle for him. I couldn't get through the song without tearing up, so I "conveniently" had something to clean up while they were doing this :-(
While I am still sad today, I am at peace. This is out of my hands and has been from the beginning. I'm praying for peace and understanding. I'm praying that we hear something tomorrow about EP approvals. If we can get our EP approval this month, there is a great chance we will travel in March. I hope we get some great news for Asher's birthday week tomorrow!!!!! 
6 comments:
Happy birthday to your sweet boy! I'm sorry he's not home to celebrate. God's timing isn't always easy for us. Hang in there!
Praying for good news!!! Keep us posted!
What a sweet way to celebrate, and I really hope your ep approval is this month so you can travel very soon. I am so sorry you did not get him by his first birthday. You are handling it great in my opinion. It is not always easy trusting in God's timing, but you are doing great. Hugs!
I'm so sorry you are missing Asher's birthday. I cannot imagine what a hard day this is for you. Praying for you, Brandi, and hoping you hear some great news very, very SOON!!!
Awe, Brandi, I can't imagine how hard it is celebrating without him but I'm happy for you guys that you went and did something fun. I'm crossing my fingers for good news this week for you!!
Hi Brandi, so sorry you’re feeling down. Of course you want to be with Asher on his birthday. It is utterly impossible to know why timing works out the way it does. It just is. What matters is how you rise to the occasion of such huge disappointment. Asher is celebrating his first birthday with those who know him most: his foster family. Next year he’ll be with his forever family. So glad to see you celebrated him and that your girls loved the food…many more good meals and birthdays to come as a family of 5.
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